My Job Pays for Our Mortgage and Daycare. But I Might Give It All Up for My Spouse’s Career.

Pay Dirt

June 17, 2026 6:00 AM

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Pay Dirt is Slate’s money advice column. Have a question? Send it to Kristin and Ilyce here . (It’s anonymous!)

Dear Pay Dirt,

I managed to bounce back after a DOGE layoff almost a year ago and landed a job with a pension, good insurance, but not the best pay. We pay a mortgage for a house that we bought three years ago. Our family of four are squeaking by just on my salary. I am six months away from completing Public Service Loan Forgiveness (PSLF). Meanwhile, my spouse has been job hunting for since 2024. They finally got an academic position, but it is several states away, and it’s a temporary position for one year with bad pay. But there is a possibility of it becoming tenure track with significant pay bump.

We initially planned to split the family so I could keep my job, get my loans forgiven, and work towards being vested in the pension. But our income won’t cover both our mortgage, rent in a second place, and childcare for our two young kids, let alone groceries, etc. There is also the emotional toll of splitting the family, which we already had to do for previous academic job two years ago. We’ve already expended our savings to get through this past year. So now we are thinking of selling the house and moving everyone. But that means giving up my union job, pension, the house, PSLF with a few months left, and a job I like. I’m in my mid-40s and worried that my job is going to get eaten up by AI, so what if I can’t find work again, let alone one that qualifies for PSLF?

My spouse starts in the early fall and it’s already summer so we have to make a decision really soon. I really just don’t know what to do.

—Cutting the Parachute Too Early

Dear Cutting the Parachute,

This is a tough one. On one hand, you’re six months away from being free of student loans, which is a huge win. On the other, your finances are stretched as thin as can be, and moving would solve that problem. Let’s break this down and see what you’d be giving up with either choice.

For many people, Public Student Loan Forgiveness (PSLF) would be worth delaying any major life changes, including a big move. (It’s also worth noting that we’re on the cusp of some major changes to PSLF , that will give the Department of Education authority to disqualify certain employers from the program based on “substantial illegal purpose” based on their own discretion. It’s worth staying on top of the changes.) Your pension and union job are also worth considering because they offer so much stability when your spouse’s job is up in the air.

All of which is to say, there’s a real risk to moving. But the costs of staying put are real, too. There’s the emotional cost of living separately, which shouldn’t be minimized, and then the actual cost of trying to afford two separate households. It sounds like staying put isn’t even financially possible unless something changes dramatically or, possibly, you go into debt. Ultimately, this is a choice only you (and your family) can make, but it helps to specify the risks. And then, with those risks in mind, ask yourselves a few questions.

For starters, how possible is the “possibility” of your spouse’s job becoming tenure track? If it’s a genuine path to stability, it might be worth a few more tallies on the “move” side of things. But if it’s a long shot, I don’t see it being worth giving up your own stability.

Another question: What’s the job market like in the new area for someone with your skills? Are there roles that would qualify for PSLF? Are there roles with similar stability? If it seems highly likely that you could land another qualifying job within a few months, the PSLF loss is less catastrophic, but again, there are some changes coming to PSLF in the next month that make it harder to know exactly what the program will look like in the future.

What would selling the house actually net you? If you have equity, it could buy you breathing room during the transition. But if you’re barely breaking even, that’s a different story. When you think about this option, you should also think about: the opportunity cost of selling (including a low interest rate if you have one), the cost of housing in the new city, and whether you’ll want to buy another home down the road.

Finally, what are the options, if any, to stay afloat if you stay? Could your spouse find a roommate and live super cheaply for the next year while you figure things out? Is there a way to bring in extra income for the next six months or so—a part-time job or some kind of side hustle?

None of these questions are going to have perfect answers, but they can at least help you get a more realistic idea of what to expect. The question isn’t whether PSLF, the pension, or the house matter —they absolutely do. The question is whether you can realistically afford to hold onto them for six more months. If the answer is yes, even barely, I would be inclined to…